Unfulfilled.

I wish I could be the wonderboy
everyone dreamt me to be.
Continue making them happy,
and thus feeling successful.
But I failed to learn the lessons.
It's hard not to want to
tip-toe back to eternity
to re-take those baby-steps.
Fighting the voices in my head tooth-and-nail,
always replaying and echoing,
never dying down.
Back to the secret garden,
where it's quiet so I can listen...
or to the playground,
with the wingset and the slide and the sandbox,
where it's carefree so I can just be...
Knowing the traits and the options,
to explore and investigate,
not to end up so unstable and lost.
The recklessness is so daunting...